Disclaimer

Disclaimer
The thoughts expressed below are the author's and the author's alone but mind you only at the time they were written. There should be no assumptions made that the author feels or does what is written here all the time. Neither is it safe to assume that even one of the quirks is present in his usual behavior. This is a fair warning - The author is well versed in the art of pagan rituals (curses etc) and is not afraid to use it!!

Saturday, March 06, 2010

Remember me?

I have been away for a long time. Life as a Sales guy can give you a lot of lone time. I haven't seen the people who make my life for about a year now. I did go home once in all this time, but never met anyone except my family. That too only for a day but that is not important. I spoke to a very close friend and had a rather hard time understanding what he was saying. That is when it struck me, something was different.

My friend was speaking so fast that I was uncomfortable. Not that I could not understand him but his speed seemed so awkward that it made me uneasy. I asked him why? and he said that I was the one acting strange. He always spoke this way. I never seemed to find it odd. Why was I acting the way that I was? Had I changed?

I am in a completely different environment right now. I have 8 people reporting to me. I am responsible for 1.5 lakhs of business every month. And I have to race to do my targets every 7 days in the month. Have I changed? When I see my friends will they feel I have changed? Will they find me different person?

I hate to even think so but have I grown up? Secretly I hope I have. I hear it is a killer attribute when it comes to bagging the girls.

I think differently about money. I have different choices for my career. I don't worry about things that made me shut myself in a dark room, curl up in a ball on the floor and cry.

So what happened? Am I closer to being me.

Logically speaking I should be. I am away from all the influences that lorded over me till now. I am surviving on my own. Decisions of clothing, food, money - all left to me. I should be coming closer to who I really want to be. No compulsions, no carrying expectations of the people around me. The people I deal with everyday now are ones that can't really screw up the way I think enough to influence my thought process. I mean they can tell me to act in a particular way but not think in any which way they want.

True to all this, I am changing. Question is, where am I headed?

Won't risk even pretending to know the answer to that one. But I am excited. Pretttty excited.

Tell you more later

tata

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