Coming back..

There is a book which says that if a person does something for 10,000 hours he becomes a genius at it. I wonder how many people have the patience to test its logic. I for on don't..or do I?

I don't like to say, "I give up". It is a bad feeling and nothing comes from closing doors. I think I can give it a try. 10,000 hours, it comes to three hours everyday for the next three years. Or, one can go for 10 hours every day for the next 3 years. They both work out the same. Can a person do the same thing for 10 hours everyday or do something consistently for 3 hours every day for 10 years? Answering that is another thing.

I should be writing. I should be writing everyday. Writing and editing what I wrote before. Free style or with prior thought...any thing at all but I should be writing. This is what I wanted to do, the reason why I am here today. Sometimes I wonder if I can still say so.

One post a day. 365 posts a year. A thousand posts in three years. Maybe by the end of 4 years when I graduate (hopefully) this can turn into a book - a book on life in a B-School. So many possibilities. So little conviction.

I can give it a start though. So here's to coming back. One post everyday. Something short and concise. A narration of an episode everyday. Something which was different or perhaps mundane. Something which was remembered at the end of the day. Some 300 words or so.

It can be done.

Famous last words?

Lets see...!!

Till tomorrow.

Finding Love

My good friend of a few months has fallen in love. I met him during our interviews and as it is with people cornered together, afraid of the same impending fate, we grew to like each other. Over the next two days when we had nothing really to do we discussed our love lives and life philosophies and our plans for the future. That is when he told me of his pains and how they had visited on him all at once. But now all is anew. He has found love and he is to be married soon. It is amazing how this guy does it. Knows her for merely 14 days and he proposed to her. She accepts and a court marriage is on the cards. Some people have all the luck.

I am not saying what he did was right or that the marriage will be a successful one but it has the feeling of a miracle to it. This is something that you read in stories. Where cupid strikes and all is then lost. The lovers are fated to meet and be together for life. Makes me remember those dreams and desires I have pushed away to the corners of my mind.

And here I am, in a city far away from his. Looking or perhaps just hoping for the same kind of love. They told me that it would be difficult but then the told me that it would not rain here either. People have a tendency to be wrong, more a general inclination to be wrong. So I sigh and get on with my life. Hope is not always a wonderful thing. It is like a Facebook page where you are afraid to push the "Add as Friend" button. So many more important things to do than this. Or is this the most important of them all?

These rains are making my brains go soft.

Later

And it all starts

The classes will starts soon and we are already being made aware of the hell that we will have to face one once they do. "Time is sacrosanct" they say. But really I miss my people.

I don't know whether to feel elated or to dejected. I am here. Doing exactly what I have been thinking about up until now. Yet I have the feeling of melancholy. I used to wonder what the word really means . Now I think I understand how it feels.

There is a fear that I will not measure up to the standards. Not the standards of the college - those are a different concern, I mean the standards and expectations that I have of myself once I am here. The things that I wish to learn and the things that I wish to do. The person I want to become. All this haunts me even as I write this piece.

I started cleaning my room today. I say this with great emphasis because I have never ventured towards any activity remotely close to it. I bought wipes and cleaning liquid from the mall and cleaned my laptop. These are crazy things if you view it from my side of the lens. I have never done such things or cared for them. And doing them will not really change much but I believe it is a declaration to myself. That things will be different now. That I will not push those boundaries which till now I had left to chance. This time I will do the ones that I keep letting pass. They are tall claims only as of now. Maybe that was the reason I was forced to go down and start cleaning my room. As a proof to my doubting self that I will let this enthusiasm fizzle out as well.

Each time I feel like keeping something for tomorrow a sneer comes from some where inside. Something taunts me saying that I am slipping to the old ways. Who is this? Is it me? I don't know. I don't care. As of now I want to do all  of what I have always wanted to do but never really got around to doing. I just feel that this time it will be done. I will do it.

But I have, perhaps, felt like this before. A sneer shoots out again.

Lets see.